Monday, 20 April 2009

Fish Story: Canto I: completed!!

Hey there, everybody!  In a storm of creativity, inspired by reading some Byron, Milton, and Vergil, and assisted by divine help in the form of inspiration and spiritual upliftedness, I've been able to start a new project very quickly.  On Saturday night (literally Sunday morning), in the shower, I was suddenly inspired to write a new story; the details came to me with rapidity, and I shortly thereafter wrote down the outline.  Then, on Sunday night (literally Monday morning), I finished the BLOB 11 script, leaving my writing slate relatively blank for the moment (I decided to wait a couple of days before continuing on the semi-complete BLOB 12 script).  So, today, after exchanging some money for my upcoming trip to Italia (yay- tomorrow! literally today), I sat down in a cafe and started to write.  The pen moved quickly, seemingly on its own, and, after transferring from Costa to Starbuck's (don't want to stay in one cafe too long!), I finally finished the first Canto of this super-long poem, all in one day!!  Canto I is 173 lines long, and contains the first part of a story about a fish named Fish who wishes for nothing in the world more than to be caught, cooked in a fine restaurant, and enjoyed as a delicacy by a human.  

I'm very excited about the project, and even more excited that it's happening so quickly!  It's like my hand is moving on its own, compelled by some outside force (oooooooohhhh) and writing poetry all by itself!!  Anywho, I may publish the canto here after I have a chance to edit it and clean it up a bit, so watch this blog!!!

Italiam fato profugus Laviniaque venio!

And yes, that is a complete destruction of Vergil's work, and yes, I did completely mess up the meter.  Auspicious sign for the quality of my own poetry? ...hmm....

BLOB 11: BLOB Family Reunion: Completed!!!

Hey there!!  Last night, after 3 a.m., having watched about 10 episodes of Power Rangers and a Vincent Price movie (Masque of the Red Death), I finally completed the script for BLOB 11!!!  I am so relieved, and happy with how it turned out in the end.  Now I just need to type it up and send it to my usual first critic (Nick) to make sure it lives up to our standards.  

The play/sitcom stars BLOB and Chilipepperman as they seek out BLOB's roots in Blobton, Kentucky, and fall right into the middle of a family feud dating from BLOB's youth.  Who will win?  The Normalsmans and their new son, Bob (BLOB) Normalsman?  The Zorningtons, with their dazzling young belle, Blobette?  The Cyber-Mummy, with his mysterious and deadly plans?  Find out by reading/seeing the play/movie!!!!  Coming soon.  I also sketched out  a little poster plan, based on the poster of the Bride of Frankenstein (starring LORD BYRON).  Here is a photo of my rough (extremely rough, in fact) sketch:  Actually, the photo ended up at the beginning of this post.  Oh well, there it is.  I'm also uploading onto the side thingy an illustration from within the text of the first meeting between BLOB and Blobette.  How romantic.  

Anywho, the script is done!  Hooray!  Now I just have to decide what medium it will be, and convince a venue to host it!  Easy as pie, one hopes.  Now I just have to thank God, without whose constant inspiration, I could not write anything.  Thank you, God!!

Tuesday, 14 April 2009

A New Project

So yesterday a new project idea came to me, and I wrote a two-page treatment.  I think it would work as a movie, but I'm not sure when it would possibly come about.

It's called 'Jason and Alicia: a Goat-Song', and it deals with a comatose man meeting his own comic-book creations in a dream state.

That's all I want to give away at this point, but I really like the project, so maybe I'll reveal more soon!

In the meantime, I'm planning on possibly finishing the script for 'BLOB 11: BLOB Family Reunion' today at a cafe, so hurrah!  Look forward to it!

BLOBtabulously yours,

Saturday, 4 April 2009

The Pain of Filmmaking

How, dear reader, how does one go from creating an indubitably about-to-win-awards film one second to lying in a spiky, poisonous plant and a bed of glass the next?  Well, any of you who know me or have had filming experience with me can easily answer that: firstly, one needs to be Schedel, or to be in his near proximity, and nextly one need only let nature run its course.  My filmmaking career is rife with near-maimings, falls presumably to doom, and more than one instance of one filmmaker kicking another in the face (sorry, Nick).  So it does not come as a surprise anymore when I have a day like this Friday.  

By all means, it was an amazing filming day.  Edinburgh's weather had uncharacteristically cleared up, and there were few clouds in the sky as I trekked up to the Crags, the cliffy area near Arthur's Seat, to film more footage for my and Brett Heasman's upcoming silent film, tentatively titled 'The Path to Clarity is a Murky Water'.  We got a looooooot of filming done, and the principal photography for the movie is now nearly complete.  But we also had some harrowing accidents and near-miss swipes from the Hand of Fate.  

It's all well and good filmmaking in the beautiful outdoors, until you get some cliffs involved.  The first mishap occurred when I, wearing the worst-tractioned shoes possible (the multicolor Blend ones I got on the family trip to Venice), decided to follow Brett down a short cliff to get a better angle.  Immediately, I slipped and, to save the camera, sacrificed my arms, catching myself in a crevasse by pointing my elbows outwards.  A resounding crack was probably heard in Glasgow as the skin was flayed off of my elbows and I lowered myself down the rest of the way.  I was fine, though, and Brett kindly inquired whether I was okay, and we continued to film.

The next mishap was the most memorable of the day, as I began to film Brett climbing our specially-made, wood-and-plaster cliff that we commissioned for the film.  As you can see from the first shot in the following video, all was going well; although Brett's feet were only about 8 or 9 feet from the ground, he looked like he was high in the air.  Not until I had the bright idea of following him up the cliff for a better angle did things all go wrong:

Now, as you can see, my bare arms were stabbed by the copious poisonous thorns of what I would like to dub the 'Scotland Crap-Bush', a perennial foe of mine from my many nocturnal excursions up the mountainous hill of Arthur's Seat.  I sustained minimal damage, and was soon back on my feet for a much longer day of filming! 

 Now, I'll just throw this in for good measure: the whole thing reminded me rather a lot of the 'Same Difference Dance Competition Debacle', wherein I, filming the almost unspeakably embarrassing dance number below for a competition with famous (I swear) brother-sister singing team Same Difference, slipped and fell in the mud, alone, in Princes' Street Gardens, with numberless angry Glaswegians looking on and shouting what I can only assume were lewd obscenities (but who can understand the Scottish?).  So enjoy my fruitless embarrassment (since Same Difference never did announce the winner for the contest) below:

Now wasn't that all worth it?  I dare say so.  And really, it didn't turn out any worse than the infamous 'Chocolate Sauce Bleeding Mouth' incident, did it, Nick?